A Soldier’s Helmet

This post is going out to a lovely lady I met at Roswell over the weekend who is in distress over losing her hair. A first-time cancer patient, she just began chemotherapy and is starting to see the results it will have on her head. It sounds like the idea of completely losing her hair is a very traumatic one. I handed her husband this URL and hope she comes to “visit.”

While I certainly can’t speak for all cancer patients, I can offer my own opinion of facing this challenge. For women, especially, hair is so personal; we use it to help identify who we are. Hopefully, the following information will help allay some fears, or at least present some different ways to view the situation (I actually enjoyed my hairless journey!).

Coping with Hair Loss (in no particular order)

• You’ll save lots of money because you won’t be going for regular appointments at your salon. I saved about $600! Use the savings to do something special for yourself.
• Consider getting a buzz cut before your hair starts falling out, or at least cut it to less than an inch. We have so little control when we’re fighting cancer; however, this is something over which we can take command. It’s also less intimidating to see small strands on your bathroom rather than clumps of long ones when your hair starts falling out. My long-time hair stylist shaved my head and it was a very touching moment for the two of us.
• Don’t forget you will be losing more than the hair on the top of your head. You will lose ALL your hair. YAY – no more shaving!
• A visit to what I call the “Chemo Salon” will most likely render you with completely different hair when it comes back in. Even if you love your hair the way it is, now you can see yourself in a different way without going to the hair stylist! My chestnut, auburn-streaked, fine, straight hair came in black, thick and curly. As a bonus, I got a “skunk stripe.” People pay good money for that! I’ve had three hair colors and different styles since I started visiting the “Chemo Salon.” A visit is like a box of chocolates – you never know what you’re going to get.
• Bring out your inner child and play dress up with wigs and scarves. Personally, I loved the Bohemian look of the scarves and never wore a wig.
• Rock it! Put on makeup and get some bold earrings. Bald IS beautiful!
• Although I said these were in no particular order, I do think this one is most important. You are in a fight for your life. You are a cancer warrior. Think of your baldness as a soldier’s helmet and wear it proudly.

I would love to hear other coping mechanisms from my readers out there, so please leave a comment to add to the list. And to my new acquaintance, I hope this will offer you some solace.

Share the Strength.

Well, Shut My Mouth

OK, friends. I have a long overdue confession. It’s finally time for me to admit this. I have (anxious gulp) bad . . . days. Yes, it’s true. My mental attitude is not always sunshine and rainbows. Occasionally there are cloudy days, and I’ve had more than a few of them the last couple weeks as the symptoms of my cancer have decided to make themselves more noticed. I’ve observed a subtle change in my vocabulary as a result.

One thing I believe in strongly is the power of words. I believe what you put out to the universe, such as words, becomes a truth to you. Think about it – if we know the negative things we say to others can hurt them, why wouldn’t the negative things we say to ourselves hurt just as much? Although that hurt may be subconscious and we may not realize it, it’s still damaging.

Although I’m feeling fine, the cancer apparently is wreaking havoc inside. In the last couple weeks, my doctors have been using words that I perceive as negative, such as “serious” and “realistic.” I know my optimism sometimes gets in the way of me being realistic; however, I certainly understand the seriousness of my situation. I have found myself starting to focus more on these words and adopt the doctors’ negative terminology. This is not a good thing. I have quickly noticed that I also don’t smile as much and am whining more. I don’t believe these things are a coincidence. It’s like an abyss has opened, and I am aware that I could easily fall into it if I am not cautious.

The title of this post — “Well, Shut My Mouth” – is an old Southern saying I grew up with that is usually uttered in amazement in response to something. In my case, this time I’m saying these words literally – I really need to shut my mouth! This includes the words that don’t actually pass my lips. I must stop the intrusion of negative words entering my vocabulary. I have always relied on my positive spirit to lift up my physical body, when needed. I believe that, without the power of my optimism, my body does not get the positive infusion it needs – and that infusion seems to be the only thing working toward my wellness right now.

So, I’ve been focusing my efforts on getting back on track and have started to feel much better the past couple days. I sense the abyss will be closed soon. In the meantime, know that it’s OK to have cloudy days. Just be sure that sunshine is in the long-range forecast.

Share the strength.